Did you know that self-sabotage is rooted in coping mechanisms you used to help you adapt, get over, or get through painful situations?
Ex: Let's say that as a child you only got attention when you got in trouble - your parents were super angry, but super attentive to you then. Well, obviously, as an adult you know not to purposely make someone mad, but you're still attached to that subconscious pattern, so you sabotage any success by doing things that make people angry (b/c in your mind you think this gets you attention - But that's whats normal to you, so thats what you seek)
This can show up as something as simple as being chronically late. People give grace in the beginning, but if you keep disrespecting their time, eventually they aren't gonna be happy about it. And boom! You sabotaged the relationship, the job, the contract, etc. All because deep down, somewhere in your childhood, you normalized that is the only way to get attention. Seems silly, but that's how it works. Your brain pretty much decided how you were going to show up as an adult before you were out of grade school.
What's so insidious about self-sabotage is that its usually unconscious and passive. People don't even know they are doing it!
When it comes to building a business, you're going to rehash those patterns over and over again. A lot of my clients come to me with questions like:
*Why do I keep doing this? Or
*Why does this keep happening to me?
Much of the work I do as a #businesscoach is uncovering those dangerous little self-sabotaging patterns so that hold you back from achieving your #goals.
Because the truth is if there weren't thoughts, patterns and behaviors worth looking at, you would have already achieved them by now!
If you find yourself:
Blaming others for something not working, or believing the problem is outside of yourself or even thinking that your success is predicated on other people
Walking away because it sounds 'too good to be true'
Procrastination/perfectionism - these go hand in hand
Living in Negative self-talk
You may be experiencing your inner self- saboteur. Time to let that person go...he/she no longer serves you.
This was originally seen on this post: https://www.instagram.com/p/CPV3eNsjls8/